Effortlessness is not 'no effort', but 'effort without struggle'
How to stop controlling and struggling, get clear and let life roll effortlessly
When was the last time you had something happen effortlessly?
You know that time when you plan a project, sit down to do a task, are looking for the right doctor/accountant/partner in crime and things just 'fall into place'?
Things just seem to align. Fate, the planets, karma: it all seems to be working FOR you. It brings you ideas, mojo, the right people at the right time, success, time when you didn't think you had any, the disappearance of problems or the appearance of solutions.
Didn't that feel great???
How often does this happen?
Not very often?
Let me tell you why:
You are trying to control things
You have a goal and you're trying to achieve it. You want to get there fast and achieve good results. Therefore, you are trying to control damage, finances, people, yourself.
Let me tell you a secret: you cannot control ANYTHING. Except your breathing, your thoughts and your actions. So stop putting any effort into controlling anything else but those things.
You live from a place of fear instead of love
Even when we manage to let go of control, we can be paralyzed by our fears. Fear of failure, fear of what other people might thing of us, fear of not being good enough.
And living a life from a place of fear never gets you where you want to go.
So next time you struggle, ask yourself: am I living from a place of fear or from a place of love? And then always choose love.
You are struggling
When you struggle with things, it is a clear sign that things are off. Off balance, off kilter, off path, off vision, off YOU.
Stop! Take a look at what you're doing and what's happening. Where are you? And where should you be? And why and where did things go wrong? Usually these questions point to a place in time where you were not aligned with your intuition, your vision, your deepest you. It's okay. It happens to all of us. Just simply realign.
You are not clear on what you want
You will always struggle if you do not know what you want. Because then any road is good. And will lead anywhere. And nowhere. So if your life is not effortless, this is the place to start: what do I want? Make a vision board, get a coach, think back to being a kid and what you loved spending hours doing. Then go do more of that.
You do not notice things
The things we need are always there. The secret is to notice them, to be aware of them. Why do you think some people always find the lucky penny on the street? Because they actually look for it, expect it, see it and pick it up. It's the same with the things that serve you.
Effortlessness does not mean no effort, but it means effort without struggle.
Read that again.
Effortlessness does not mean no effort, but it means effort without struggle.
So next time you struggle, think about the above. And ask yourself:
Am I clear on what I want?
Am I making choices and decisions from a place of fear or love?
Am I trying to control things or trying things to 'go my way'?
And then simply realign.
The above is valid whether you are struggling to get the kids organised, cook daily meals, do shopping and homework. It's also valid if you're starting your business or trying to increase your business. It's valid in your relationship with friends, partner, family. It's valid for little and big things in life.
So here's to knowing what you want and creating it effortlessly!
Additional reading:
The Art of Effortless Living - Ingrid Bacci
The Effortless Life: A Concise Manual for Contentment, Mindfulness, & Flow - Leo Babauta
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